I gave up on you

I’ve been writing about love all these years; letters, poems, little thoughts, songs in the corner of my notebooks, texts, entries in my journal that no one will ever read... and despite love is the greatest feeling someone can experience... its tiring, it’s consuming and worthless. 

There is not point in life to love someone else when you barely know how to love yourself, even if that’s sounds cliché. You put so much energy, time, passion, smiles... for someone that, sure, it’s nice, it’s good, it’s probably a keeper, "the one"... put probably, and correct me if I’m wrong, won’t love you the same. 

And there is nothing wrong in that. In every new relationship there is always someone that falls deeper and faster than the other one, sometimes it can be you and when that happens, it’s probably that you will end hurt, just because you started to feel love sooner. And let me tell you that there is nothing wrong in that. It could be sad, weird and even humiliating, and it can take a long time to heal the wounds of the embarrassing moments when you swear it was all perfect, like a love story meant to be. But love is tricky. And shouldn’t be a priority loving someone else but you, because that’s the only thing that’s is completely real and sure in the end, you and only you. 

So let it go. Let that person as a memory, as a learning and growing. Wish them the best and don’t look back. And don’t think that someone else will eventually come into your life, because that’s use another bad use of energy and hope. The truth is that maybe nobody will come, there is not saviors, and despite all the good examples in fairytales, not everyone gets a happily ever after with someone. Like I said, "you" it’s the only thing on life that its sure.


Esperanza Guzmán

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